MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT SEXUAL ASSAULT AND RAPE
Solomon Buchi July 1, 2019
It is not new that rape has been one of the most gruesome crimes prevalent against women, that is highly under-reported and treated with levity. Why? Because the society is constantly churning out excuses for rapists and subtly fostering this malevolent act. They cajole these women into silence and shame – the stigma attached to being raped is outrageous. Hardly anybody to believe them because there are always questions to why the rapist targeted her and how it happened.
Why didn’t she shout or fight back when he raped her?
Rape does not always happen in the most violent way that many people imagine. Sometimes, the victims do not shout, scream, or fight back. There are many reasons why they become silent. Sometimes, the victim is shocked beyond words and cannot even say or feel a thing until everything is over. This is referred to as tonic immobility: a temporary state of paralysis induced extreme fear. Asides shock, some fear for their lives because they may be killed for physically resisting, either by shouting or kicking. Unfortunately, they had to decide to cooperate in order to live.
In fact, a woman might get wet while being raped, she might moan and have an orgasm, this does not take away the fact that the rapist engaged force to get to the victim; the victim had not actively consented!
Also, in many cases, the question about what she wore comes in; all these are subtle ways to redirect the blame from the rapist to the victim. Clothes are not responsible for rape, rapists do, and no woman owes a rapist a decent dressing. There are rape cases of fully dressed women in Burka or hijab or of babies. So what?
We need to situate these men in a zero-tolerance culture where they are 100% responsible for rape. A woman does not have to dress a certain way or avoid socializing to prevent being raped. Women have the right to leisure, which may include clubbing, visiting their friends, and a decent level of alcohol consumption. She should be left alone to enjoy her time. Do not rape her because you should not rape her. No woman should give you reasons not to rape her.
Why didn’t she shout or fight back when he raped her?
This culture of rape is more than about sex; it is a display of male supremacy and women subordination. If rape were all about sex, there are safe ways of securing consensual sex. Rape is premised on a pattern that places the man above the woman and sponsoring a toxic ego in him that he is entitled to everything, including a woman's body, time, and affection. So If he is unable to receive this, he is not man enough, thus, why they exert force and manipulative tactics. In the end, rape is to feed their unhealthy ego and identity, and it is high time we called it out and made these men fully accountable for their actions.
Rapists cause rape. Nothing else.
Rapists cause rape. Nothing else.